Vocals, bass, drums (not always at the same time), piccolo, Sitar
Ironman finishes: 4
Hours spent in med tent/ER: 1
Kinner is the multi-instrumentalist of the group; prior to the band's adoption of a full-time drummer he generally flipped a coin before each show to determine whether he would play bass or drums. You might recognize his face (when he's not wearing spandex and an aero helmet) since he spent much of his mis-guided youth as the percussive-powerhouse behind the legendary "P.M.S. Blues Band" out of Kansas City, KS.
Logging hundreds of gigs throughout the Kansas City area, Kinner has seen every neon Hamm's beer sign in the city. "We tried to get them to secure chicken wire in front of the stage" recalls Kinner of one of their livelier gigs, "but the bar owners called us babies and told us to suck it up." By the way, he still drums for the "PMS Blues Band". Like any prima donna musician, he thinks he needs to be in multiple bands to express his true artistic ability. (What Ever!)
It was experiences such as those that helped Kinner to evolve into a talented drummer, leveraging his unique ability to simultaneously keep a beat and duck behind his ride cymbal when tomatoes or bottles start flying. It wasn't until joining forces with Shultz and Roberts last year that Kinner branched out into stringed instruments after being told, "We can't have a lead singer hide behind a drum kit. You have to learn to play the bass!" And learn he did; Kinner can now knock out each of the four notes required to accompany Roberts and Shultz's searing guitar riffs and is coming on strong as a force to reckon with in the triathlon world.
Guitar, vocals, keyboards, cowbell, Japanese koto, auto-tune
Ironman finishes: 1.9
Hours spent in med tent/ER: 48
Shultz's illustrious music career started at the age of 13 with acclaimed, Rockville, Maryland basement band, "Turning Point". Following a bitter breakup Shultz moved on to "Ded Eddy", the one-song opening act for notorious Echo Hill Summer Camp bad boys, "Flight Crew". Following his move to the Midwest in the mid-80s, Shultz joined underground alt-rockers, "Triple Owners of the World", touring KFCs around the globe before heading to college and joining Roberts in cover band whose name, unfortunately, we can't remember since our freshman year of college was a tad blurry.
Shultz is the band's founder, having written the lyrics to their first song, "Pass the Chamois Butt'r", in their entirety during the hot, miserable run leg while completing his first half Ironman. After Shultz's first attempt at an Ironman landed him in the ICU for 48-hours he enlisted the help of Kinner and Roberts to take the imaginary Ironband into the realm of semi-reality. It was during this time that first full-length album was unleashed upon a small, and stunned, group of close friends and fellow athletes.
These days Shultz's notable triathlon achievements involve managing to cross the finish at races without a forced, post-race stay in the emergency room, and his main musical achievements are writing such children's hits as "I'm not the one who tooted" with his small children who are, in their own right, on their way to musical and triathlon greatness. Long-term goals include upping his Ironman finish record to more than 50% and headlining the finish line concert at Kona.
Drums, both standard and the Japanese Taiko, cowbell, wooden sticks
PR: we don't do PRs in adventure racing
Hours spent in med tent/ER: the ER is for panzies
Justin is the sole member of Ironband never to have completed an Ironman Triathlon. That said, his application for band membership by-passed the normal red-tape and background checks given his prowess in long-distance, multi-day adventure racing which, as reported by the rest of the band, is "a whole lot $!^&%*$ harder than a triathlon on a road with a well-marked course."
Justin brings an air of youth to the band and despite his penchant for bubble gum pop bands his setlist additions have brought an entirely new dimension to a live Ironband show. In addition to being a wizard with his sticks and a cowbell, Justin also serves as the band's unofficial bartender and always shows up for rehearsal with just the right concoction for any time of the day or night.
Guitar, vocals, pan flute, thumb cymbals
Ironman finishes: 5
Hours spent in med tent/ER: 2.2
If you don't recognize this triathlon/guitar prodigy, picture him with large sunglasses and bigger hair. Yes, that's him - famous lead-guitarist of Denver-based "Three Legged Dog", the Meister Brau-powered power-chord rockers that thrilled fans from Mile High Stadium to Red Rocks Amphitheatre in the mid-80s.
After an on-again-off-again rotation of gigs at sorority parties and house parties during their years together at KU during which nary more than three chords were played, Roberts and Shultz reunited to launch the infamous sold-out annual acoustic performances in Shultz's basement during an annual holiday party before eventually plugging back into amplifiers when Ironband was formed. Roberts' long-term Ironman goal is to take an hour off his Ironman PR each time he races despite a lack of training and to finally learn the Pentatonic Scale on his guitar.
Currently on temporary hiatus from Ironband, Roberts is fully entrenched in a tour of eastern Floridian IHOP restaurants in support of his new solo album, "One Pancake Shy." We look forward to his next Ironband appearance later this year so stay tuned.