Pass the Chamois Butt'r


Liner Notes:The song that started it all...written entirely during the course of competing in a half-Ironman, this song tells the tell of a long summer spent training with friends and the gelatinous substance that made it all possible.

he's got hair, flows everywhere
gold chains around his neck

speedy esquire, won't ride in the rain
and if Oprah's on, home is where he'll train

then there's the Dragon, scone-powered rocket
he'll take an oatmeal stout before an egg white omelette

chains and cogs and cranksets too
(and a pocket full of gu)
don’t forget the post race brew

so pass the chamois butt’r
put down the putter
it only takes a squirt or two
put on your spandex
and get your legs waxed
you can be a real man too

there's Herr Dexter workin' in his basement lab
weldin' bike frames, and workin' on his abs

his friend Soft Serve, fastest biker in the land
just make sure you never catch him in can

we've got a student racer, always in high gear
readin' textbooks never bringing up the rear

chains and cogs and cranksets too
and a pocket full of gu
don’t forget the post race brew

so pass the chamois butt’r
put down the putter
it only takes a squirt or two
put on your spandex
and get your legs waxed
you can be a real man too

you can be a real man too
you can be a real man too